Part of promoting your personal brand effectively is to radiate a confidence that draws people in and makes them want to find out more about you. Then if there’s a fit between what you provide and what they need, hopefully they make the investment to hire you, or recommend you to someone who can.
When you’re feeling low
But what if you’re just not feeling very confident these days? What if you’ve already cut your business operations to the bone and still won’t be able to make payroll unless a new client lands on your doorstep tomorrow?
Or what if your job search has gone on longer than you had hoped, and with your bank account dwindling and bills piling up, you’re ready to take a job as an overqualified intern to the worst boss in the world?
How do you get out there and talk up the strengths of your personal brand to get potential employers and clients to fall in love with you when you’re just not feeling the love yourself?
While there are no magic words to make that next job or client materialize overnight, there are ways to give yourself a quick confidence boost so you can get back out there with renewed vim and vigor.
Four ideas to move you in the right direction:
1) Get some exercise. Releasing endorphins and getting oxygen to your brain through aerobic exercise will make you feel better physically, which will automatically lift your 
spirits. You don’t even have to run a marathon. A brisk 30-minute walk where you pump your arms and breathe deeply should do the trick, or if you prefer, take a spin class and really get into the pulsating music. Once you’ve showered and had a healthy snack, you’ll feel amazing and ready to tackle anything.
2) Journal an achievement. Think about a success or accomplishment you had that you felt especially proud about. Take yourself back to that moment and write out what happened, either on your computer or long hand. Chronicle not only what you did to create the result, but also how you felt, and especially the positive feedback you heard from others. The more detail you give, the more vivid the memory will be and the more you’ll actually begin to feel those great emotions you initially experienced.
3) Celebrate, but don’t commiserate. Get together with a group of friends and plan a fun event together. Go to a comedy club, have a pajama party, plan a long bike ride and a picnic in the woods. You don’t need to blow a lot of money to have a good time when you’re with people you really like. But enjoy the moment and don’t use the time to replay every obstacle you’ve encountered and start feeling sorry for yourself all over again. Give yourself permission to take the evening or the day off from your worries.
4) Test out “afformations.” This is one of my favorite exercises. My friend Noah St. John, author of The Secret Code of Success, penned the phrase “afformation” which is a very powerful twist on what most of us know as “affirmations.” An affirmation is a phrase you repeat to yourself that describes the state you want to be in, such as “I am rich” or “I have a great job.” The rationale is that what you say you will eventually believe, and then ultimately will manifest. Trouble is, Noah says, that our brain never quite believes what we’re saying, the affirmation doesn’t stick, nothing changes, and we get more depressed than ever.
Instead, he teaches “afformations,” where instead of statements, you ask yourself questions, such as “Why are people beating down my door to work with me?” or “Why is money suddenly pouring in?” When you ask a question, your brain automatically goes into problem-solving mode to find answers. Make a list of all the ones you come up with. Some might make you feel good (“Because I’m the absolute best at what I do”), some might make you chuckle (“Because I bribed every single person in the company to sign my praises”) and some just might lead to new strategies that you can use (“Because I wrote a kick-ass cover letter that the hiring manager could not ignore”).
Keeping up your confidence takes energy, and pretending to be confident when you’re not can be exhausting. Rather than continuing to grind away and looking for external sources to boost your spirits, try one or more of these activities to raise your confidence levels from the inside out.
Author:
Liz Lynch is founder of the Center for Networking Excellence and author of Smart Networking: Attract a Following In Person and Online (McGraw-Hill, 2008). She writes, speaks and consults to experienced professionals on how to seamlessly integrate social media and traditional networking to save time and accelerate results.
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Tnx for this post Liz, its timely for me at this time.
I’ll work out on afformation principle!
Thanks, Possicon, glad you enjoyed it! Definitely try out a few afformations. They’re great!
Networking. Networking. Networking. That’s what it is all about (for me at least). Before I jumped on the bandwagon, I thought Twitter was nothing more than a glorified Facebook status-update – which it can be, depending on how you use it. But it really is amazing the connections and relationships you can establish in 140-character-or-less!
That is what I try to explain to people outside the twitter-verse. Some get it, some don’t. Some have jumped in, some think it’s pointless. To each his own – but I have witnessed first hand the ‘power’ of Twitter!
Totally copy-pasted the wrong comment in the wrong box there (that’s what I get for spell checking in Word) – sorry about that.
But the one thing I was going to say here is that I really connected with the second point. I don’t so much journal my achievements. But I am a big advocate of list-making. And there is something to be said for that moment when you can cross off the list a task you have been wanting to get done. That sort of ’self affirmation’ can be really rewarding, and when you are feeling down, being able to visibly recognize accomplishments is extremely important. Great post!
No worries, Matt, happens to the best of us
I love making lists and agree that it’s quite rewarding to cross off completed tasks. I sometimes write stuff down that I’ve already done just to cross it off 
Nice piece, Liz…!!!
I think a lot of people out there are struggling with this at the moment, and your advice is spot on. There was another good piece about job search by Peter Bregman that compliments yours. You can see it at:
http://blogs.harvardbusiness.org/bregman/2009/02/need-to-find-a-job-stop-lookin.html
BTW, i don’t even know how I came across your article. I think the world is getting smaller….
Best… Steve
Steve, thanks for the article. Just printed it out and look forward to reading it.
ABout to go to bed but just want to say thanks for this. Just what the doctor ordered!
Thanks, Scott! Glad it helped!
I really like the idea of the journal. It’d be good to keep a journal of mistakes also, but not for someone with self esteem issues. Mistakes are worth learning from and if you write them down you won’t repeat them again You’ve got to have a short memory like an NFL quarterback who throws an interception and then gets right back on the field. Of course he’s going to go over it in the film room, but for now keep your head up.
Factor77, you’re right, it can be excruciating to “watch the game tapes” but extremely helpful. But, yes, someone with self-esteem issues might focus too much on the negative, and not enough on “Okay I know what I can do to improve next time.”
I love the afformations!
Going to be asking myself a lot of interesting questions soon. lol
Thanks for the mention, Liz. I really enjoyed our interview – you’re awesome!
I also use a tool called iAfform to make sure my subconscious thought patterns stay positive and empowered without me having to do anything.
You can get a free 60-second iAfform Stress Buster at http://iAfform.com
Test it out and let me know what you think.
~Noah
Great, Noah! I’ll have to check those out. Anthony, you might want to check out http://iAfform.com as well.
Great article! I especially like that you cite exercise as a mood booster due to endorphins and increased oxygen intake. There’s also the feeling of accomplishment and overall wellbeing. Personally, I also like the “afformation” idea and find it very motivating.
Thank you!