Fact or fiction? I have trouble with the word “all” in the title. It’s one of those absolutes like always and never that leave no room for diversity. After this week, it feels more like fact than fiction. I remembered Seth Godin’s book titled, All Marketers are Liars, and think mimicking his title is apropos for the focus of this post (catches your attention doesn’t it, especially if you’re a marketer).
Every profession has its share of bullies. They are the ones who attack others who have a differing opinion using absolutes. Instead of a professional discussion around the subject, their fervor (even anger) is focused on the person. They are the ones with that “my way or the highway” attitude who are not open to discussion. They may not behave this way in every situation, yet around certain subjects when they hear a differing opinion or practice they leap into full bullying action with words of attack and even gathering others to create a “mob mentality” inciting others to join in on the bullying.
This week I published a post with a recommendation I provide to solopreneurs first delving into social media. I know it’s not a recommendation that everyone agrees with but as an advocate for solopreneurs and small business, I do what I recommend and have watched it successfully help a solopreneur kickstart themselves into creating a more social business. In fact, after a small business owner hired me to assist her with her social business strategy, I asked her what I ask all my new clients, “Why did you choose me”? Her answer, “because you’re nice”. She explained that she had spoken to several marketing consultants, agencies and social media gurus and every one of them made her feel stupid and small for not knowing more about social media. They spoke in acronyms, smirked at her lack of knowledge and then even chided her that doing it on her own will only waste her time, money and that she would eventually fail.
She said she felt bullied.
Let me be clear – I’m not making light of bullying. I believe there are bullies in all walks of life, of all ages and all stages in careers. By definition, bullying is use of superior strength or influence to intimidate (someone), typically to force him or her to do what one wants.
You may know your stuff but knowing it and acting like a “know it all” are two entirely different things. What can you do to be a pro in your industry and not a bully?
Read Stephen Covey’s Book, the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.
- Be Proactive. Take the initiative. If someone’s opinion is different than yours, ask them “why they feel or practice what they do and then listen.” You may learn something and the frame of reference may give you a better bearing and understanding. Take responsibility for your choices and the consequences that follow. If you do blurt something out, there’s nothing wrong with sincerely apologizing and starting the conversation over again.
- Begin with the End in Mind. What do you want from the interaction? Is it more important to win or more important to develop a relationship?
- Put First Things First. What matters most?
- Think Win-Win. Genuinely strive for mutually beneficial solutions or agreements in your relationships. Value and respect people by understanding a “win” for all is ultimately a better long-term resolution than if only one person in the situation had got his way.
- Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood. Ask, keep an open mind, and listen – this creates an atmosphere of relationship building and positive problem solving.
- Synergize. Combine the strengths of people instead of being a person who has to tear someone else down to stand taller. Stand tall together – it’s a great way to build relationships and your personal brand.
- Sharpen the Saw. Continually learn, hone and develop your skills.
I hope that for 2014 these helpful reminders of the 7 Habits will help you start the New Year right and this post will help you to honestly review your successes and challenges this past year.
This week our contributors also shared with you:
- Side-Hustling: Tracy DiNunzio, Founder of Tradesy by Bill Connolly
- Workplace Drama: Easier to Eliminate Than You May Think by Skip Weisman
- Ensure Potential Connections Accept Your Connection Requests by Crystal Washington
- Interview: What Inspires You? by Nance Rosen
- Plan Your New Year’s Personal Branding Strategy by Ceren Cubukcu
- I Have the Qualifications. Why Am I Not Hired? by Alex Freund
- Fast Track Business Development in 2014 Now! by Elinor Stutz
- Networking During the Holidays: Light Up Your Personal Brand by Heather Huhman
- Your Job Search Gold Mine by Richard Kirby
- Re-Defining Religion: An Interview with Allison Josephs by Bill Connolly
- Can’t Resist a Handshake by Eddy Ricci
- 4 Ways Your Personal Brand Wins with No by Maria Elena Duron
- Why Your Brand Needs a Blog by Susan Gilbert
- Millennials and the Gore-Tex Way by Jeff Shuey
- Start Fast: How to Build a Strong Freelance Reputation by Chamber of Commerce
- Successful Interviewees Follow this Advice: Be Authentic! by Beth Kuhel
- Make Your Email Engaging, Not Enraging by Leslie Truex
- You’re Not a Failure; You Experienced Failure by Nick Inglis
- Is This Resume Still Relevant? by Marc Miller
Here are some tweetable takeaways from this week’s posts, too:
All of us at the Personal Branding Blog, hope you have an amazing holiday week!